Really Freakin' Scary

(Via AGITPROP)

What's up on the terror front? Any new scary stuff out there? Of course there is - this is America!

The TSA says you should be scared of your gel inserts and your baby's pacifier. In fact, you should be scared of babies in general. Joe Lieberman has joined Dick Cheney in saying that you should be scared of Ned Lamont. Connecticut voters are also to be feared because, as we all know, they love the terrorists. And don't forget to be scared of seventy-nine percent of Democrats - they love the terrorists too.

You should also be scared of baking ingredients, breast milk, pure maple syrup, soft drinks, toothpaste, random angry people, Muslims running for elected office, anyone with a disposable cell phone, Google, and The Christian Science Monitor. Al Qaeda is still scary, but it doesn't seem to be in the top ten right now. Iranians who blog, however, are right up there. You should be scared shitless of Adobe Photoshop CS and its users. However, it seems nail clippers are no longer terrifying.

Please list any other scary items you think of in the comments, but only if you're not scared of your computer.